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An example from Professor Swami is ‘you’re actually pretty with makeup on – it makes your nose look smaller’.
He says: ‘Negging directly contradicts the idea of reciprocity which is an important pillar of social psychology and a key component of attraction.
You make fun of her off the back of it and she’ll apparently want to have sex.
Many use things like magic tricks or scripted ‘plays’ to get women to notice them.
Swami tells uk, ‘There’s a range of famous PUA set pieces, with dubious names ranging from Strawberry Fields to The Cube Routine, which the so-called experts claim are tried and tested to guarantee success.
‘Deception and manipulation are the key threads that run through these routines – and they offer no foundation for a healthy, equal and trusting relationship.’ Strawberry Fields, for example, involves asking a woman questions about an imaginary field and seeing how many strawberries she’d pick.
When she gives you a number, you’re supposed to tell her that actually it represents how much sex she wants to have.
There are far fewer gender differences in attraction and relationship formation that we might like to believe.’ He believes that – although many of the men who follow PUA don’t realise it, ‘approaching the art of love as a war to be won means they are ultimately exerting a misogynistic desire to control women’s behaviour.’ Preach.
If you’ve ever watched a PUA online, you’ll notice their methods are anything but natural.
While many of us harbour a general distaste for this, the reason people still flock to read books like The Game is because they believe it works. Professor Swami takes exception to the idea that attraction can be boiled down to scientific theories.
Professor Viren Swami from Anglia Ruskin University, a leading expert on the psychology of romantic attraction, knows better than the rest of us whether PUA theories are up to scratch. In particular is the theory of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), which was popularised by ‘founding father’ of pickup artistry Ross Jeffries.
Swami explains: ‘He stated women are like cats because they do not take orders, like shiny new things, can be tempted to chase you, and “rub against you and purr when they like you”.
‘These metaphors are common in the pickup artist world where men are urged to ‘train’ women by rewarding positive and punishing negative behaviour.’ Now, although cats are great, and get to chill out and sleep all day, it’s quite clear that women aren’t pets that can be trained.
Pickup artists are relying on bogus, armchair interpretations of psychology, biology and physiology.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating