bbw dating site tango wire - Dating guarded people

If you have a traumatic experience in your past, or you’re ashamed of your story then you don’t have to share it.

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Eventually, the person will slowly let their guard down.

But while their “security system” has been downgraded, their defensive mechanisms remain on alert (a byproduct of evolution, by the way.)Still, many will somehow manage to find a person to believe in despite their understandable reservations. That other “someone” must often contend with the remnants of the guarded person’s past.

Whether or not such contention is acceptable or not is up to the individual.

However, if you truly love the person, you will – at the very least – try and find a way to make the relationship work.

Without that expression of love you’re crippling yourself.

Be courageous enough to express love and shine your light. Single men and women can find very creative ways to keep others out.

As an analogy…If your computer was hacked, what would you do? In the same (albeit, more humanistic) way, those whose trust has been violated secure and safeguard their emotions.

Similarly, someone whose trust has been abused instinctively begin to fortify a defensive position.

Communication can be done by learning to own your No’s and Yes’s.

It takes practice and discipline but a wall isn’t necessary.

It’s likely, knowingly or unknowingly, that your own actions have resulted in someone else’s pain.

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