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If our goal is to move positively toward God-glorifying lives (rather than simply to “walk the line” by attempting to satisfy our fleshly desires as much as possible without sinning), wisdom and godliness would seem to counsel keeping relationships shorter.Certainly, as God’s people, we don’t want to live in fear and have our lives be primarily defined by avoiding temptation rather than positively seeking after Christ. Still, where particular known areas of temptation exist, it’s not living in fear to be deliberate about taking the wiser course.I discuss this principle more fully in “Principles for Drawing Boundaries” and “What Does a Biblical Relationship Look Like?

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Let me try to deal very briefly with the most popular responses I get to this argument — especially from college students.

I think it does, even if the physical circumstances are different.

Sadly, statistics and anecdotal experience both indicate that even the couples who spend time in dating relationships of any length, sin physically.

The longer the relationship, the higher the percentage.

As to emotional intimacy, we live in the age of email, free long distance and unlimited any-time minutes, and cheap flights.

It’s still really easy to “act married” emotionally, even in a long-distance relationship.On most college campuses, that likely puts the two of you in the same relatively small social circle.Perhaps both of you are active in the same campus ministry, you go to the same church.If we act like we’re married before we’ve made that commitment, we’re defrauding (and sinning).I don’t know whether you’ve noticed this, but people involved in a dating relationship tend to get to know each other better over the course of that relationship.This is exactly the level of intimacy that is reserved for marriage only and that dating couples should make every effort to restrain until the appropriate time.

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